fuck my life

So my issue seems to be my valve again. I am wearing a plugged catheter to straighten it out but I need to go back to the Palms since this is just a temporary fix.  I am under so much stress. I have so much going on.

In order

My car is in the shop with a deductable I have no money to get it out of the shop.

My tags are expired over a stupid ticket I got when I was ready to have surgery 8 months ago and the ticket is 390.00. Texas has a stupid law you can’t renew your tags with any outstanding tickets. I guess the idiot cop that gave me the ticket put the wrong address down so I never got a court date I requested in person in the mail. I was told to write a letter requesting a court date then I could register my car. Instead I have an attorney/debt collector contacting me over the fee. Since my valve is fucked up and I have a catheter in it is just not comfortable to walk around or stand so going in person is going to be rough.

I have to move in a few days and I can’t finish packing. My husband is in Cali training for his new MOS.

I need to fly down to Florida and no clue where I am staying or how I am getting there but I might have to have surgery to fix this valve. I don’t trust the kpouch surgeon here I guess to see him and he isn’t that helpful.

I need a platform for my king size mattress since my new loft has a pretty gross floor. I need rugs too.

I can’t work a full time job. My mind is ready to explode with stress. I sold my crossfit equipment and I have nothing left to sell. I am spending money I basically don’t have hoping I don’t bounce checks. I can’t afford to be sick any longer and have all these issues. The most assistance I can get for cancer “grants” is 100 bucks. I have to be up in 5 hours for a CT scan and I can’t sleep since I didn’t pick my Ativan up.

I need my life back. I need help. I don’t understand how people get by living like this. This is not the lifestyle I am used to. I can’t take it.


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